All posts in category O Self

First Month In Vancouver

Meanwhile in Vancouver. The weather is perfect, days of clear sun or misting rain while the east coast gets hammered in snow. I fight off either a tail of a head cold or pollen allergies and try to be good about job hunting on a borrowed couch. I research about wrestling holds for a story […]

Fantasies On The Weekend

I wonder about how he’d look helpless. We haven’t had that opportunity to restrain him completely, although I know he’s game (no leashes though, no! Noooo! It’s kinda cute how resistive he is, even if I’m going to respect that hard limit). Coy man will hide what he wants behind what I want, but occasionally […]

Leash Fantasies for Him

My arousal is a suffusion from the nape of my neck to my knees, a warmth and skin hunger that buzzes away in my breasts and the softness of the inside of my thighs. I think about a thing he doesn’t want to do and it is erotic. At the party, I took his necktie, […]

Puzzles and Problems

It’s there, but goodness only knows where it is. No amount of standard levers will shift this particular boulder, slap him, push him, sit on him and none of these things push him there. It’s day 3 of his visit and he’s finishing off the crunchy bakery bread toasts and fluffed up scrambled eggs I […]

On The Cultural Limits of Conventional Femdom

So in addition to neglecting my femdom blog, I’m an avid participator in nerdy hobbies like roleplaying. Realistically this has always intersected with my sexuality- once I was charting my path beyond my parents running a tabletop for me.¬† I got interested in it partially because my head craves weird dynamics I can’t find in […]

Ending 2017

For Auld Lang Syne, whatever the heck that means. 2017 is over. Breaking up with Wildcard has led to a unique amount of closure because it was so non-adversarial. I like to think it was even heathy, if painful. The longer apart I am from him, the more I find myself appreciating him as a […]

Fucking Myself on a Solitary Evening

Sundown, night fall, rain on the glass of the window and the road. Four orgasms, frisked out from my cunt, an evening¬† alone. The first two are standard, sheer black lace panties yanked off and pitched into the hamper across the room. I find my small clit after stroking the slick of wetness up through […]

And Some Things Still Suck

A good part of my life remains not about the sex, and with my decreased involvement in the BDSM community proper is leaves me flailing about a bit for where I stand on stuff. With Brick it’s something incredibly new, and hilariously, driven by my libido being several magnitudes over his (honeymoon phase he says. […]

Honestly, I Need To Get Fucked

I need you to fuck me in a way that makes me want to shred your skin and bruise you. I want to see you vulnerable and helpless and there’s the ache and the little niggling tinge of fear for me because to want something is to let yourself be open to the possibility of […]

Fall Changes, Forward Motion and Endings

Lately it’s been a life lived in a general state of desire I’ve missed. I’m happy to have my lust back, happy to crave and want and not feel completely undesired although I have once again screwed myself (and not in the good way) via setting my wants on someone out of easy reach for […]