All posts tagged rant

Fuck Homophobia; Fuck Islamophobia

This is more like a one shot service announcement, but as a sexual libertine I wanted to put this out there, based on the Orlando tragedy: Fuck homophobia. Fuck blaming Muslims. As a non-American I don’t feel qualified to give more than an opinion on the subject of gun control (why do you need those? […]

Kink.com Excludes Femdom From Mainstream BDSM

This shit is what I’m talking about here, when I talk about the sexism that femdoms deal with, when it comes to being taken seriously as a part of BDSM. This is the navigation menu for kink.com, which helps you find their sub-sites, sorted by 5 options. Gay gets its own category that excludes F/f, which […]

Not All Femdoms Are Sex Workers

Once again, an innocent question from a redditor reminds me of one of the problems that comes with being a non-professional dominant. Or really any conversation about femdom. I get messages from people in my inbox (I guess I seem authoritative) of various sites and this is not an unusual occurrence. Sometimes it’s a guy […]

On Femdom In Popular Culture

I guess one of the hardest parts of conventional heterosexual femdom is how damn disempowering it feels. Maybe some women get joy out of it in the porn and movie version, but in my perception, it takes the idea of female power and turns it into a grotesque parody, one propped up by a very narrow […]

Lifestyle VS Pro and The Male Sub Loot Grab

So I was recently reading the advice of the blogger Cara Sutra, on the difference between professional and lifestyle dominants. And I’m sorry, she got it wrong. Cara is an experienced and award winning sex journalist and I have nothing personally against her, but this post is rife with errors and the sort of general […]

More Gems From Femdom Society (Part 1)

So I thought that before I deleted my account at Femdom Society I’d check out their much vaunted “University”. Because hey, they might charge you almost eight bucks a month, but that part’s free! Let’s take a peek at Freshman class #1 for doms…. Before We start, We want You to know Our system is […]

If You’re Not Into It’s Really Fucking Annoying

But honestly even if I were a femsub, some people’s approach would still make me a very angry woman. I take dominants hitting on me really, really personally. I don’t know why, but it’s one of the fastest ways to get under my skin in the scene. For example, at the last play party I […]

Evo-psych? (And ranting)

Rant time, skip if you don’t wanna see my whine about internet strangers. I’m normally pretty Pollyanna about how all the sexualties can get along, but then some earnest person posts this, on /r/bdsmcommunity, about getting the mainstream to accept kink. Fourth, bdsm in all its many forms is base. It is primal. That is […]

7 Pieces of Missing Sex Ed

Seven things I wish were included in sex-ed, for kinky and non-kinky people alike, including the truth about oral sex, an all too common reality of masculinity and a major reason why matching up your sexuality with other people is always a headache.