8 Things to Buy for Your Domme For Valentine’s Day 2021

Yes, you have four weeks until the holiday. But postage delivery is slammed and everyone is shopping online this year, so I’m giving you a curated list now. As with my last gift guide, what to buy your domme for valentine’s day leans heavily to small businesses and independent makers, particularly kinky ones.

One of a Kind Rope Ceramics by Lexi Pots

It’s a small vessel that stealthily communicates a love of bondage, the unique texture and glazing of this ropework clay pot is pretty enough to put out in public, and quiet enough not to make the wrong people ask questions.

Designer (Potter? Yeah, potter is the right word here…) Lexi makes each by hand, throwing similarly patterned mugs and other vessels, in rough hemp look or detailed lace. Her shop is new- up until recently she worked by commission, and the one of a kind nature of her work means that if you want something shipped in time, buying sooner rather than later is better.

Archer and Olive Bullet Journal in “Secret Keepers”

The fancy must have item in the planning community might have gotten it’s primacy through aggressive influencer marketing, but the Secret Keeper is undeniably beautiful. At $32 USD it comes in a fancy gift box and promising a higher weight of no bleed through paper, while the dot grid is a discreet way of helping your line work and handwriting look less sloppy.

Yes, this caught my eye as a personal coveted item, because while the maker also offers flowers, moons and other trendy designs I am a sucker for the symbolism of keys.

Pair it with a decent set of markers, or a nice calligraphy pen. Stickers aren’t a bad idea, either. Whether your domme decides to use it to doodle or to strictly track your progress, it’s a prestige item whose stamped brass-to-gold keys let you overlap femdom pride with artistic organizing.

Silver Anatomical Heart Locket by Peggy Skemp

An ominous anatomical heart locket offers a delightfully macabre way to express love. There’s dozens of designs on the market now, in all sorts of metals and price points. I picked this one as it’s got a directly traceable designer and fairly old pedigree (2009!).

I’ve seen these offered in materials ranging from resin to brass, and in every size from mouse to cat, but I like that the inside of this locket looks shaped to be the heart chambers, rather than ending the attention to detail.

Fill your locket with a very small nude, a secret only your domme gets to keep, or your credit card number and pin. You know your domme best.

Rose Flogger by Art of Whips

The rose flogger is not a new concept, and by now it’s available in a rainbow of colours real roses can’t be found in. So, why this one? Review of quality matters, because the rose and blossom flogger makes for a small sacrifice of structural stability over aesthetics.

Fragile or not, it’s a fully functional impact play tool, with a pleasant extra weight in the petaled falls and a nice balance at the end of a swing.

Art of Whips has a reliable star rating, which bodes well for it’s chance not to explode after a few snaps on the butt and back of a deserving bottom. Don’t skimp here, nothing’s sadder than dishing out the thud only to accidentally behead your weapon.

Catherine D’Lish Deluxe Maribou Trimmed Robe in Merlot

deluxe femme fatale robe

Is your domme feminine? Heck, are they anything on the spectrum other than butch? Your dominant wants this fancy robe for Valentine’s day. I want this robe. I want her/them to have this robe. Hell, I want YOU to have this robe.

However, if she already owns it… then get her another one in a different colour. Seriously, it’s the femme fatale extravagance that launched a thousand imitators. At $500 US you might be tempted to get a copy instead, but don’t. It’s every bit as lush and soft as pictured and the knock offs will disappoint.

And if you really must, yes there’s a ruffled vegan option and a glossy satin version. Regardless of your pick, with a likely high demand, you should get it now. You can thank me later. ^_^

Daddy has No Gender Sticker

Because I know a lot of dommes who are also Daddy, although my own personal tastes lead heavy femme and I’m surprisingly rigid in titles (for someone she uses she/they), I would be remiss not to toss this item into the Valentine’s tribute pile.

Daddy has No Gender” is particularly affordable to add to a card, maybe along with a meal out, or a nice boot blacking session. Or just as a little something for those broke-and-queer folx.

Certainly, I definitely do have a favourite pair of very vintage Doc Martins in my cupboard that make me feel dominant and tough, so it might not be *my* favourite word I can be glad there’s more aesthetics out there for us.

Red PVC Mask by Cybill Troy

There’s a lot of different masks in the shop, 5 Point 6 Roentgen, so it was a hard task to choose a favourite. In the end, although there’s a constantly updating stock of options, I had to go with the shiny number on the left.

I was a bit concerned, at least at first that a vinyl face mask was going to be a non-starter. The material might be fashion (and fetish) forward but a covid mask isn’t supposed to block all air, just particles. However, I can say from owning the black version, that the inside fabric layers offer plenty of filtered ventilation.

Give it to your domme for a park date, to make her the ultimate object of no-touch tease and denial, or keep it for better days as an accessory to compliment fetish wear and punk looks alike.

And, buy it knowing the original name of the shop was “Off Duty Dominatrix”. She might not be scening in the dungeon right now, but Cybill Troy can definitely serve a look, can’t she?

The Basilisk by Wandering Bard Toys

Ok, I admit I actually want this not for the fantasy of doing a lizard that can make you hard as stone. I like the unique curve-and-ridge combo of this break out designer’s hand poured, body (and butt) safe silicone dildo.

Whether your domme’s the type to strap one on or satisfy her own orifices, The Basilisk offers both the standards (three sizes, custom density options) and a shape I really haven’t seen in any other line.

Don’t like the colour? No problem! If blue isn’t to your tastes the mold masters at this two person work shop will blend you all sorts of other shades.

Inevitable Disclosure:
Nobody paid my to write this and I am not receiving kickbacks or even review copies. I mean, honestly if someone wants to send me any of these, I have a PO box?

Something Positive From MTL: A Lingerie for Men Show!

After that necessary barrage of negativity about abuse allegations, and the unhinged messages from special salad man, I want to digress into talking about something pretty neat happening in my city…

A Lingerie for Men Fashion Show!

I often talk about the strictures on men, particularly male subs, not to be objects of sexual desire. As a woman, there are lingerie looks I can try from frothy in ruffles to fierce in leather. As a male, the lingerie for men options usually demand simply cross dress or offer aggressive sports wear or strict bondage looks. The dichotomy is strict- modern masculinity eschews softness. For a gender that is automatically associated with dominance for many people, the list of rules governing what men can’t do without getting their gender questioned is long enough if this were a BDSM contract we’d be telling the top to scale back to something more realistic.

It wasn’t always that way. Once upon a time, men didn’t have to enter the complicated world of gender bending to enjoy lace, but let it burst from beneath their clothes at they collars and cuffs, and hemmed their private linens with the same pride as women.

Enter Wicked Mmm


They have a fashion show on October 20, 2016 that is their brand fundraiser launch. In keeping with the open and forward thinking spirit of Montreal, they are using male, female and non-binary identified models. Although aimed at male leaning persons, their tagline is pretty clear that it’s for all people with packages (even those who pack).

Because nobody consented to be denied lace because of their gender.

If you want to check out their catalog, they have an etsy shop as they continue their ongoing launch. Myself, despite a crazy busy week, I’m planning on making it out to the show- and if you aren’t sold on the lace, there’s a raffle for a number of great services in the city and several of the finest burlesque stars in Montreal strutting their stuff.

Required disclosure: These nice folks aren’t paying me to promote them. I’m not even getting comped tickets, I just like what they are doing. Because I know the team responsible (Mashacat and Willcat), they were nice enough to give me permission to repost from their recent fashion shoot. Those singlets are to die for!

eLust #84:

Elust 84 header
Photo courtesy of A to sub-Bee

Welcome to Elust #84 

The only place where the smartest and hottest sex bloggers are featured under one roof every month. Whether you’re looking for sex journalism, erotic writing, relationship advice or kinky discussions it’ll be here at Elust. Want to be included in Elust #85? Start with the rules, come back August 1st to submit something and subscribe to the RSS feed for updates!

~ This Month’s Top Three Posts ~

About Those “Apple Thighs”
Why the Hell Haven’t I Rebelled Yet?

~ Featured Post (Molly’s Picks) ~

IDENTITY – hiding the evidence
friday flash–service

~Readers Choice from Sexbytes ~

Good In Bed

Erotic Fiction

Pubic Disturbance
Colds and Lust
Sex Machine
A Dirty Bathroom Floor
I’m Sorry I’m So Silent
S’il Vous Plaît
Edge of Morning
Dancin’ (Most) of the Night Away
Airport Arrivals

Sex News, Opinion, Interviews, Politics & Humor

42 Kinds of Casual Sex
Living in Fear – An Essay on Male Entitlement

Thoughts & Advice on Kink & Fetish

How To Give A Bare Handed Spanking
Reconciling dominance and love
She’s a Very Kinky Gor

Body Talk and Sexual Health

Run the good race

Erotic Non-Fiction

We Made A Resolution To Make Love Everyday
The 20 Minute Orgasm
More on cunt, corridors & Schroedinger’s cock
Stoned Birthday Sex
Room with a View
I’m Not Done With Your Throat Yet
It’s a strange path to trust.

Thoughts & Advice on Sex & Relationships

Poly and Pets

Writing about Writing

Why Write Erotic Fiction?
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16 Most Popular Posts of 2015

thenewyearslistHappy New Year!

Jumping on the bandwagon, whether most shared or most loved, here’s the top 2015 posts on omisspearl, listed in ascending order based on number of views. It looks like this year’s been heavy on informational content but light on BDSM stories- makes sense as everyone loves a sexy, tingling tale of lust and the stats are crammed full of well read favourites from years past. In light of that, How does “write more porn” sound as a blogging resolution?

That’s definitely going to be my goal for 2016, given that my fiction remains above and beyond the most well read and enjoyed content. And writing more porn means planning to have lots of inspiration. Mmm, I’m going to have fun!

Looking over my old writing, I can tell last year’s been heavily focused on building a life with Wildcard and coming to terms with people treating me like I know what I’m talking about. However, not mentioned in this list is the thing I’m most proud of this year, launching my first published erotic novel, and the first part of the Catamite trilogy, The Pet Gentleman, or honestly, a lot of personal vanilla growth. Sometimes this has severely impacted my ability to focus on my online life and work as a writer (I feel so bad that there’s so much promised content I’ve yet to deliver!), but I still have to admit that I’m in a way better place, today, than I was 365 days ago.  Curious to see what else gathered the most eyeballs last year? Take a look!

16 – A Little Bit of Simple, Easy Femdom Sex

15 – Wildcard’s Submission: A History

14 – Lifestyle VS Pro and The Male Sub Loot Grab

13 – #Service4Pearl: In Which I Post An Ad For A Service Sub

12 – On Femdom In Popular Culture

11 – Answering: “Am I A Femdom?”

10Spank, Ruin His Orgasm, Make Him Scream

9 – Femdom Problems: Being a Dominatrix VS Getting What You Want

8 – Friday Femdom Fiction: Meeting Her Slave

7 – Femdom Nouvelle and Beyond BDSM

6 – Femdom Spanking Practice

5 – Reader Letter:New Femdom Tips

4 – Not All Femdoms Are Sex Workers

3 – Friday Femdom Fiction: A Bitch at the Beach

2 – Femdom Stuff to Make Him Do While You Figure Things Out

1 – 19 Replies To Every Online Femdom Discussion Ever

Elust #76 – Article Share!

Elust header
Photo courtesy of Charlie in the Pool

Welcome to Elust #76

The only place where the smartest and hottest sex bloggers are featured under one roof every month. Whether you’re looking for sex journalism, erotic writing,

relationship advice or kinky discussions it’ll be here at Elust. Want to be included in Elust #75? Start with the rules, come back November 1st to submit something and subscribe to the RSS feed for updates!


~ This Month’s Top Three Posts ~

Sex and the post-birth vagina

Lonely Things

Just the two of us


~ Featured Post (Molly’s Picks) ~

Tiny, shiny, bity snaps of steel…

I have fallen in and out of love with myself


~ Readers Choice from Sexbytes ~

*You really should consider adding your popular posts here too*

I had An Abortion

All blogs that have a submission in this edition must re-post this digest from tip-to-toe on their blogs within 7 days. Re-posting the photo is optional and

the use of the “read more…” tag is allowable after this point. Thank you, and enjoy!


Erotic Fiction

The End of the Run
Ladies Who Lunch
kink of the week: dirty panties
Brutal Nights
Because I Knew I Shouldn’t
Erotic Fiction: “Everything”
Look, Don’t Touch
As one night ends…
String Quartet
Unmasked: Part 1: The Gift
The Secret Rolls

Erotic Non-Fiction

The lick of love.
Tickle & Tease
Oral Sex, Don’t Forget Oral Hygiene – Whoops!
Feed my senses
Camming With A Foot Lover
Finding the Edges
Word power
The Mail Room
Doing It Herself

Sex News, Opinion, Interviews, Politics & Humor

I Had An Abortion
The 7 Dimensions of Cock

Thoughts & Advice on Kink & Fetish

When I Thought the Scene Was Done
Introducing the Abject Kitten, Part 2
The Joy of Fear
Talking About BDSM With Your Therapist
On Denial (and topping from the bottom)

Thoughts & Advice on Sex & Relationships

I Did It My Way
Fuckin With Fuck Boys Part II
You don’t need my permission to fuck my lover

Writing About Writing

The Hunt for Adult/Sex Friendly Businesses


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Catamite: The Pet Gentleman

Femdom art is fun art  Guess what’s coming! You’re looking at the rough draft of the first book of Catamite – my little project is almost ready for its debut!

Consider me more than a little excited to be able to announce that this book is definitely going to happen – at least thus far in ebook form. Its in the final editing stage – and obviously I need to do  better job with the text layout – but I can be please to share that I’ll be launching the first volume in time for your summer reading plans.

And yes, I’m tempted to release it as “too hot for literotica!” sticker. 😉

I’d like to take the time to thank the artist, for her professionalism, patience and all around talent. She was a joy to work with, and I look forward to working with her to develop covers for books 2 and 3… as well as other projects.

OMG, omg, isn’t that art fabulous? Check it out!


Best Bondage Erotica 2015: Free Giveaway!

bestbondageIt’s that time of year again and Cleis Press is launching Best Bondage Erotica 2015, a continuation of their hot, hit series. Showcasing old and new writers in hot and imaginative kinky scenes, its a great sampler of sexy ideas.

To celebrate their launch, the’ve given me a review copy, and why should bloggers get all the loot? Since its more fun to read the real thing than a review I’m running a giveaway.

Follow the link and enter to win your copy here!

Best Bondage Erotica 2015 is also available via Amazon and Barnes & Noble if you’re not feeling so lucky- either way I’ve already gotten a sneak peek and I’m certainly enjoying the stories.

Wanna Do BDSM on TV?

Screen-shot-2012-08-23-at-8-56-55-PM_001A New York based television show is looking for couples who want to spice up their love lives… and share it all with the public. Ever wanted to do femdom on reality television?

I get all sorts of requests and PR suggestions in my inbox, and my first response is usually to delete, but this one caught my eye. I talked with one of the producers further and they’re making a sincere effort to give it a shot.

They’re also looking for active-in-the-lifestyle BDSM consultants, so who knows, maybe Miss Pearl will be on cable next year. 😛

The pitch:


Is your sex life too vanilla?  Do you want something different?  Inspired by the 50 Shades of Grey craze, Magilla Entertainment and a major cable network are looking for couples who want to add a little more spice to their relationship for 21 days.  This series will document the couple as they go on this transformative journey of finding ways to improve their sex life with the help of an expert.  Following the “21 Day Myth” in which people can mentally and physically make changes after this certain time period, this docu-series will capture the excitement and the fears of the couple as they test out this new lifestyle change.  If you are interested, contact us ASAP at castingdirector@magilla.tv with “SEX LIFE” in the subject along with your names, ages, location, occupation, contact numbers, recent photos and a brief paragraph about why you want to change your sex life.

So, anyone want to take the plunge?

(Not a paid advert)

Bad Girls Blogger Award

Victoria Vista over at Sexual Destinies recently gave me a hat tip in the form of the blogger chosen “Bad Girl Bloggers” award.

She put me in the company of Remittance Girl and Rori- pretty epic comparisons if you ask me! Of course trying to choose my favorite blogger is going to be impossible, since you’re all pretty wonderful, so I thought I’d give a bump to four other bloggers who are genuinely daring (and why).

Ferns of Domme Chronicles, for herwillingness to share one of the hardest things about this femdom thing- the vulnerability of our own desire. Also Ferns is a bit of a web celebrity in femdom circles.

Dumb Domme of the same, for her relatively unsung efforts to make it clear anyone can hack this kinky thing.

Not Just Bitchy, published but Stabbity, for not being afraid to tell it like it is in honest language.

Perverse Cowgirl for being insightful for sharing the highs and the lows of her life.


RULES: If you are a recipient, please choose 3-5 female bloggers who write about sex (or post sexy pics of themselves, or both) that you admire and award them by passing on the award photo above and the rules. Also, give a brief explanation of why you love those bloggers so much. Be sure to notify your favorite bloggers that they got the award!

(I personally am chain-post agnostic- but I like all the people who I’m pimping)

Now, that being said, sex blogging is a female dominated field- so I’d love it if people shared their favourite bloggers of both genders in the comments- and that includes your own blog too!